Thursday, October 23, 2003

Vodka Strength Training: The only slightly interesting thing about the divorce of these two hideous people, is his claim that she got stronger when she drank vodka. Now a New York Times reporter has gone around interviewing government health nannies and bartenders and the like about whether this is possible.

I agree with Gothamist. This is my favorite kind of journalism. But I don't think reporter Michael Brick went far enough.

So, in order to satisfy the booming curiosity about whether vodka can give you super-powers, I'm going on a vodka bender tonight, starting at the Russian Vodka room.

Look back to this space tomorrow for a full report on just how strong I am under the influence.

Update: It occurs to me that exposure to vodka might not make everyone stronger. It might be like what happened to the fantastic four--we'd all get individualized super-powers. Liza gets stronger but I'd like the power to make other people invisible, so I wouldn't have to see them ever again. I'll start with Gest.

Update, Update: It's more likely that my power will be to erase memories. Like the magic wand in Men In Black. Only I'll erase my own memories. And, come to think of it, I've already got that power from Jameson's.